It’s Wednesday and finally sunny and perfect in Los Angeles and what I really wish I were doing right now is sewing or knitting indoors with the Scottish show “Shetland” streaming off Netflix into my living room and surrounding me with the chill North Sea air and all the wee bonnie crimes.
Also I have decided that the Shetland island (islands?) is on my short list for relocation, and I just need to visit first to be sure I don’t get island fever like that time I went to Maui alone and got off the plane, rented a Jeep, and drove the entire circumference of the island and was ready to return to LA by noon.
Our next trip is in the same general direction, we are off to London for a long weekend and I’m beyond excited. Our Madrid trip in February was cursed and we are ready for a do-over trip. Everything that could go wrong went wrong starting with WE ALMOST MISSED THE PLANE which seriously NEVER happens. I am one of those arrive-three-hours-early types, I love my time sitting in the lounge drinking champagne or pretentious mixed drinks while eating stale party mix and eavesdropping on tourists.
I’m already packed for the London jaunt and I’ve been practicing speaking British all week by saying, “Hi there, tossers!” in traffic and welcoming folks to my office with an offer of tea and wankers. See how well I speak British!
When I’m not doing this dreadful thing called “making a living to pay for all this” I am also sewing all the things. I started with the Cashmerette Turner Dress and then spent all of last weekend perfecting the Sew Over It Heather Dress in honor of my upcoming trip to London whereby I will also be shopping until my credit card weeps in sorrow.
Honestly I am a weekend sweatshop of one and I could not be happier.
My next project is probably a wrap dress, although who knows what I will buy on my Sew Over It shopping spree so all plans could change depending on what treasures I uncover in England.
Oh, and CRIME. Let’s not forget all the crime I need to solve while I am there. Fairly certain I would make a right sassy detective, sort of a Columbo-meets-Clarissa-Explains-It-All character who always gets to the bottom of the mystery. If you haven’t seen “Shetland” yet I highly recommend it, it’s a wonderful show and it will make you want to knit and wear all the hats and scarves and sweaters and chunky socks. Also, I have maybe been telling people that I am watching this incredible documentary about my future home Shetland, so I’m taking it awfully seriously, perhaps?
My spiraling depression of late February/early March 2018 dissipated along with the crippling flu. It is a reminder to me to never make sweeping life decisions when I am sick. I was ready to quit my job and sell all my stuff and start a cult. Plus I did some ill-informed ebay-ing. Ugh. Really glad that’s over! My ankle is almost back to normal, and I am well and alive and happy and not telling porky pies. (So good at British!!)
In preparation for my upcoming trip I tried adding milk to my tea but it was godawful and I gagged. Go home, Britain, you’re drunk. Maybe it was the wrong kind of tea. Does anyone know what tea real British people drink? I don’t want to embarrass America by ordering a Long Island Tea with milk or something. Oh, the humanity.
That’s it for today. Unless you have a crime you want me to solve, in that case DO TELL in the comments.